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Wednesday, 09/16/2009 - 4:14 p.m.

So I got contacts on Wednesday last week and the right eye was the correct lens and the left eye was "close to what it needed to be". And by "close to what it needed to be", Dr. Hardbody meant "The world will swim, your depth perception will be fucked and you'll get nauseated by hour 2 of wearing these things". So I took them out, threw up a little, and took a nap. The correct lens came in today and so far I can see but I have a headache.

The bondage demo on Friday went great! I was nervous for no good reason. I played with the Birdboy and made him pass out. Whoops. That scared 5 years off my life and killed all the good buzz I was getting off our scene. I did breath play with a flogger around his neck and down he went. It took all of 5 seconds, if that long. He and his mistress have done breath play numerous times, complete with him turning purple and convulsing but not once has he passed out. In all the times I've done breath play with DC or the Boy, neither of them passed out. We got him down off the cross and he recovered quickly. My hands were shaking bad enough I was afraid to pat him on the head. He's doing fine, though, and doesn't hold it against me. It probably won me some points, truth be told.

Later I beat the crap out of DC and it went well until I got him down in the floor to bite him. Then his back went *twang* and we were done playing. I did get to inflict several bites, one of which is still hurting him today. He's still striped up from the viper tongue, too, so yay us.

I went to Podunk late Saturday night (after sleeping most of Saturday day away) to help pack up all my crap. The Boy is definitely moving on the 21st and we're all heartbroken about it. I didn't realize how intertwined our lives had become until I saw all the duplicates of hair and bath stuff, and cleaned out my drawer and DC's drawer. Not only did I have a drawer, so did my husband. I said goodbye to all the kitties and held my shit together until I got in the car. I cried about half of the way home. I'll see the Boy again before he's moved for good but I won't see the kitties for quite a while. I feel like I'm dumping my kindergartener off - he's going back home to family who love him but he's leaving all the people here who accept him as he is and he'll be *alone*.

I came home on Monday and had to immediately get ready for a screening. It was a screening for someone who had attended the club in the past but was such a lunatic nutjob he was asked not to come back. He's gotten himself straightened out and was actually pleasant to be around. I was so afraid he was going to act like a lunatic I worked myself up into some pretty good gastrointestinal distress.

So I was ill when DC had his meltdown later on that night. Great. Work has him stressed to the point he can't sleep and he cries at the drop of a hat. I was like that myself before I quit so I totally sympathize. However, on top of Friday night, the weekend with the Boy and that screening I was wiped out. I got him calmed down and he finally slept but I didn't sleep til almost 5 am Tuesday morning. Feh.

I applied for a job as an organ harvester on brain-dead donors so DC can finally quit. I've watched bone harvesting and cornea harvesting on deceased donors and had no problem with it. I'm 100% sure I could work on deceased people but I'm having a much harder time with living donors. I know they're brain dead and will never wake up but to me it still will be hard. I had a hard time with my first double mastectomy and I got over it but do I really want to "get over" taking a living person's organs, knowing death is a foregone conclusion?

I'm sort of back on track today but I could use with some more sleep. And the Xbox is broken so no Saints Row gun therapy.

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