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Saturday, 07/18/2009 - 8:25 a.m.

I just jerked myself awake from the most bizarre nightmare ever. DC cut off Whoopi Goldberg's head, put it in my bed, and then tried to drown my little brother in our bathtub. I had to beat my own husband near to death with a brass bedpost from my bed and then I chewed off his left eyebrow. I actually felt my teeth hit skull and that's what woke me up. What the fuck?!

Thank you, Rosemary's Baby, right before bedtime. Thank you, Bones, Gormogon serial killer plot device.

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