Friday, 11/06/2009 - 1:39 a.m.

For the first time since March, I have something resembling a period and I'm massively irritated over it. Feh. I ate an entire can of cold spinach (with a ton of garlic) at 2 this morning because I had a craving. I also ate an entire packet of raw strawberry muffin mix a few days ago, again because I had a craving. My face broke out about Monday (same time as the muffin mix) but it's mostly cleared up. I'm crying at everything and snappish about everything. Double feh. On the bright side, the sex has been phenomenal.

I have a small play date lined up with Mal and I'm irritated over *that*. Tippytoeing around his issues irritates the piss out of me. He's not done anything wrong but he's complicated and I don't like complicated. I have a very set idea of what I want to do and I don't want that idea fucked with. He should just shut the hell up and come along for the ride. All of which reminds me I have to hit Home Depot and Hobby Lobby tomorrow for Saturday's supplies.

Part of what's wrong is I'm detoxing. I haven't had a narcotic pain pill in *days*. I haven't needed one - I burst into tears Tuesday when I realized my teeth are no longer the nightmare they have been. It doesn't hurt to brush or eat or take a big deep breath of cold air. I've had hot popcorn these past 4 days, instead of having to wait for it to cool down to room temp. so it didn't hurt my teeth. I've been sucking down cold soda like someone is going to take it away from me - again, no more waiting 'til it's room temp. to drink it. I can gargle without having to hold the Listerine in my mouth until it warms up. I can sleep on either side without being afraid of waking up to throbbing heat in my face because I slept too long on one side. I forgot what "normal" was like until I didn't have it any more. For almost a month all I did was sleep, pop a *lot* of pills (and not just painkillers), cry, and eat soft foods. I even lost a little weight because there'd be days where all I could do was drink cool soup. When I got tired of soup, there were days when all I had was toast because it didn't require chewing.

I finally got my groove back this weekend. I started cleaning out my pigpen of a room (5 loads of laundry and counting!) because I had energy again. I got the kitchen squared away, including the sticky stove top, and was on top of the kitty litter. And then *boom* - PMS bullshit from hell.

I'm going to eat some very salty popcorn and go to bed with Scully and Mulder. Tomorrow will be a better day.

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